Skip to content


by Sarah on May 12th, 2011

I’ve recently started seeing a Life Coach who I’ve asked to help me with my fire and discipline. The bottom line is that I need to become more organised, and I need to look at what is blocking me from this. In this week’s session we chatted about a few different emotionswhich I’ve been experiencing, and then we hit on an interesting point: I’m always looking for re-assurance from people. A lot of what I do and achieve is for recognition from others, and not for myself.

This concept isn’t new to me, I’ve known it about myself for a while, but what I realised in the session is how deeply ingrained it is. When we figured it out, I made a statement about my realisation, but added “surely?” at the end. My Life Coach pointed out that my statement sounded really wise and powerful, until I added the “surely?”. That one word made me sound like I was questioning myself, and needing her approval. I was shocked, and made another statement, ending it with a “hey?”. I caught myself this time and burst out laughing. In realising how deeply I needed other people’s approval and opinions, I needed her approval and opinion!

So, my task for the week is to stay as present as I can (I have to do a little meditation at various points throughout the day) and I have to stay aware of when this “saboteur” appears. This the voice in my head which always questions myself and looks to others for answers. We all have lots of different saboteurs, and the more in touch and aware we are of them, the easier it is to say goodbye to them.

I’m telling you what I’m learning and going through because I imagine that many other moms out there have the same need for approval and re-assurance. And even if this is not one of your saboteurs, it can only help you to watch which other one is preying on your thoughts, so that you too, can work on getting rid of them once for all. This is important because a mind which needs less assurance from others, or which is less critical, less judgmental, or just less busy, is far more proactive and powerful mind. And that can only lead to a more peaceful, joyful life as a woman and a mother.

  • Robyn

    Sarah, your honesty is inspiring and with all my heart please keep sharing in this manner. The fact that you have had the courage and willingness to recognise one of the ways you self-sabotage (and we all have many) will make it see much easier to recognise the little gremlin again and to transform it. And the best part, is that once you have healed this, your higher self will throw the next challenge at you, and not only will you evolve from ruthless but compassionate honesty again when you see what it is that need be healed, but all of us that read about that next adventure and so on, benefit from humbly sharing in your experiences! As you grow, so do you create the opportunity for us to grow as well! Ewe!
    You girl Girl! With love and thanks xxx

  • Anonymous

    Thank you so much, Robyn. It really does feel good to be able to share what
    I’m learning about myself with others. I really do hope that it does touch
    people to look into their own hearts, and learn more about themselves (and
    their saboteurs) too.